What Do You Expect?

I spotted the sign and thought, why not?

An estate sale was in progress and since I found a parking spot on the street, I decided to see what treasures the house held.

As I entered, the women conducting the sale greeted me with a smile and told me, “There’s something in every room.”

The kitchen cupboards held casserole dishes and stemware. Silver pieces covered the dining room table. The pantry shelves contained rows of cookbooks. All were reminders of days gone by, reflections of a household no longer needed.

 

Did the owners move to a senior living residence? Did they expect to leave their belongings behind? Did they think they would stay in this home until their last breath?

The upstairs closet contained only women’s clothing. Had she passed? Or had he died years ago, and she passed? Or were these clothes the woman knew she’d never wear again in her new residence? The wardrobe boasted attractive and stylish clothing of the past; classy and classic. I speculated she used her silver pieces and dressed for fancy dinner parties.  I tried to imagine life once in the home. Now strangers passed through the house, evaluating, considering, picking up treasures, or passing by. Are the children disposing of the property and contents? I had questions, but no answers.

My curiosity kept me moving through the large house. When I entered another bedroom, I paused. Two wedding gowns were hanging on curtain rods on widows. Large gold gift boxes that once held the gowns, rested nearby on the floor. I read the label: “Preserved for a Lifetime of Loveliness”. Did the gowns belong to daughters? Why didn’t they want them? And…have the gowns have lasted longer than the marriages? Was the marriage not preserved for a lifetime? Is that what the brides expected?

Expectations: a strong belief that something will happen or be the case in the future.

We all have expectations. Some are more dramatic than others. They may be dreams, hopes, or common-sense practical anticipation. Some expectations are realized and bring joy and success; other expectations fail and yield disappointments. Some are minor, some serious.

Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a dream fulfilled is a tree of life.

(Proverbs 13:12 NLT)

Rain keeps us from enjoying a day at the beach.

Writers hope to have an article or book published but they are rejected by editors.

A young woman thinks her boyfriend will propose but he has cold feet and they break-up.

My cheesecake flops when I take it from the oven.

A teen goes out for a sports team and doesn’t make the cut.

A husband dies and retirement dreams are extinguished.

My connecting flight is delayed and I miss most of a reunion.

The deal on a dream house falls through.

A friendship disintegrates.

A diagnosis changes the trajectory of life.

The marriage isn’t preserved for a lifetime.

Expectations come in the form of time, relationships, dreams, emotions, and success.

How do we manage unrealized expectations? What keeps us moving forward in disappointments?

Can you offer words of wisdom and encouragement from your experiences? Join the conversation to guide us. Don’t we want to be preserved for a lifetime of loveliness?

Treasures in Dance and Life

My best friend, Micki, and I transferred to a large university our junior year. When we scheduled classes, getting in to those for our major wasn’t difficult, but finding an open class for the required PE class was a challenge. Students had registered at the close of last semester, so few classes were open. Micki stood next to me registering for the same. “Well,” the advisor said, “it looks like you have a choice of wrestling, basketball, and intermediate modern dance. All other PE classes are closed.”

Micki and I looked at each other in a panic. I didn’t know if I would laugh or cry. “Intermediate?” I asked incredulously. “I’ve never even had beginning.” (Not to mention that I wasn't remotely interested in the class.)

“That’s fine, you can still get into the class.”                                      

Micki and I registered, not knowing what we were getting into. We needed two PE classes and couldn’t double up in the three remaining semesters.                                                                                            

The day came for class to start, and wearing our leotards, we walked into the gym. One of the students said with (sickening) enthusiasm, “Our instructor studied abroad this past summer. Isn’t that wonderful? I can’t wait to see what she teaches us.”

I wasn’t feeling it. The beautiful instructor, long straight blonde hair, and walking toward the center of the gym in   statuesque posture, read the class list. It appeared she knew many students. Of course, she did- they had been in beginning modern dance.

“Alright ladies, let’s go to the bars.” Micki and I followed the others’ leads. We had no idea what we were doing.

“Third position”, the instructor called.

I imitated the girl in front of me. Micki, behind me, said in a stage whisper, “Marilyn, what happened to first and second?”

“I have no idea,” I whispered. “I’m just following the girl in front of me.”

It was nothing short of a miracle we got through the semester and actually passed the course. I won’t even describe our group presentation for our final.

Positions. It amazes me how there are purposefully designed positions in dance. The techniques enable you to move with grace, flow, and ease.

People in scripture have been positioned to move purposefully too.

In Genesis, Hagar a slave girl, was thrown out of the house and sent to a desert. It was there she met God. It is the first time in scripture we read the name El Roi. She gave this name to the LORD who spoke to her: "’You are the God who sees me,’ for she said, ‘I have now seen the One who sees me.’" (Genesis 16:13 NIV)

Hagar was positioned to be the first female to see the character of our God who sees every detail of our lives.

In Genesis, we meet Joseph-sold into captivity by his jealous brothers. Joseph rose to leadership, was falsely accused and imprisoned, then released to use his wisdom to save people from famine. When reunited with his brothers, he told them,

“ ‘You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives.’” (Genesis 50:20 NIV)

Joseph understood God had positioned him for specific roles and purpose.

As an infant, Moses was placed in a basket in the crocodile infested Nile River, by his courageous mother in an attempt to save his life from murder by Pharaoh. An Egyptian princess rescued him and he was raised and educated in a palace. Later, he became God’s instrument to deliver the Israelites. (Read the accounts in Exodus.)

God positioned Moses for a task.

Esther, a Hebrew orphan, was sent to a palace, chosen to be queen, and then saved her people. She had “come to royal position for such a time as this.” (Esther 4:14b NIV)

God positioned Esther for an amazing life-saving role.

God positions us today, perhaps not to save a nation, but to influence people. You may be positioned in your family, neighborhood, workplace, small group, organization, committee, or in a simple conversation. Your life may have changed in a move, by a diagnosis, or with an empty nest but has purpose. Each of us has been positioned.

We may be uncomfortable, but our positions matter, and so does what we do about them: words, decisions, attitudes, and interactions are opportunities to use our positions.

Intermediate modern dance, was an experience I’d like to forget, but fifty years later, it’s fresh in my mind. So is the fact in that semester’s position, I persevered through the unfamiliarity and discomfort and passed the course.

What about your positions and the position you are in now? How do you see your purpose and influence to dance in your God-appointed position?

*Photo courtesy of Bailey Rose Foland